Our newest feature "Ask Esther" enables teachers from Jewish schools nation-wide to access the expertise and wise counsel of one of our senior educational leaders, Esther Kramer. Esther is a former principal, faculty member of Bank Street College of Education, and facilitator for Schools Attuned courses, and has been the Hidden Sparks Internal Coach Program Coordinator and Mentor since the program's inception in 2oo8.
Please e-mail your questions to AskEsther@hiddensparks.org --new questions will be posted soon.
Visit the "Ask Esther" Archive" to view Q & A’s from previous months.
Note: All identifying details are changed in posted questions and responses.
Dear Esther,
I'm a first grade teacher. I have one student in my class whose family had fire in their house and lost all their possessions. The only possessions the child owns from before the fire are those that were in school. Before the fire this child was a complacent, well behaved child that was eager to participate and please. She does have a slight attention issue and used to be jumping all over the place.
Since the fire she has been extremely protective over her possessions, if her classmates move her desk, her briefcase, or pencil, she shuts down. She stands or sits in the same place refusing to move even if she is in the way of her classmates. When she is asked to do a worksheet or join a class activity many times she refuses to move and stares at the floor; she has to be encouraged to participate in things that used to excite her. Many times this student does the exact opposite of what i ask the class to do. (For example, if I ask the class to face forward, she will face backwards. If I ask her to turn around please, she will comply but only after much cajoling and encouragement, and if I choose to ignore it then she will just spend the whole lesson facing the opposite direction.) Many days she refuses to pack up, and doesn't want to go home, and then there are some days when she refuses to come inside the classroom--she just stands outside and says things like, "I hate this school, I wanna go home....."
This was a child that before the fire was all over and couldn't sit still for 10 minutes, and now she sits in the same place and stares at the wall for 20 minutes straight sometimes. It is clear to me that she is really hurting, and probably needs professional intervention. Her parents are extremely uncooperative and the school does not have the resources to take care of the situation professionally. But I'd like to know what I, as a teacher, can do to help this student, and I would like some advice about what to do when she is being un cooperative.
Thank you!
I agree with you. The primary need here is for the intervention of a therapist who can approach the trauma this student has experienced. The fire that destroyed this child's home has also damaged her sense of safety and security, and that needs to be addressed directly and soon. A first suggestion is The Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services (JBFCS, www.jbfcs.org ) which has several branches in and around New York City. They are an excellent source of information. Are there other mental health services in the community which might be available? Does the school have any means of reaching out to local hospitals which might have out-patient clinics?
There are some general ways that you can offer secondary support in the classroom. Try reducing the demands when she seems stressed. Provide her with ongoing reassurances during the day. Reinforce those activities that seem to provide the most comfort. When she seems unable to move away from opposition, let her know you understand that she is angry but you still need her to comply. Always reward her compliance. Although these supports may help alleviate symptoms, in truth the most effective help will come from directed therapy from a mental health professional. I would explore all pathways to make that happen.
